Eros in a Narcissistic Culture An Analysis Anchored in the Life-World

While many books have been written about human sexuality, few have seriously explored the philosophical and psychological meaning of erotic love. This reflects a bias and a problem in contemporary culture: the misunderstanding of eros out of a theory of physiological drive-reduction (ignoring the countervailing motivation toward intensification rather than reduction of conscious feeling) has led to an egocentric view of human nature, which in turn motivates a simplistic hedonism in value thinking and an atomistic-individualist conception of society. The ultra-competitive nature of this kind of culture leads to overconcern with masks of invulnerability - i.e., narcissism - which prevents the dropping of superficial defenses necessary for deep and authentic love relationships to mature. But the intense, direct experience of the intrinsic value of another being embodied in authentic love experiences is needed to combat the existential threats to the meaningfulness of life (alienation, powerlessness, relative insignificance in the ultimate scheme, and death). This experience is motivated by the need to be pulled out of oneself into a non-egocentric way of experiencing which cares as much about expressing value feelings, in order to deepen and intensify them, as it does about reducing egocentric drives. The misunderstanding, neglect, and dysfunction of this basic human need thus reflects a serious problem in the psychology of the self and the structure of the community, whose study requires a phenomenological rather than a merely empirical-scientific approach, since the latter approach alone leads almost inevitably to the very reductionism at issue.